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Dirty but Interesting

Sameer Jamal
Ranch Hand

Joined: Feb 16, 2001
Posts: 1870
The science of shitology.... Do feel free to add in.

Ghost Shit
The kind where you feel the shit come out, but
there is no shit in the
toilet.
Clean shit
The kind where you shit it out, see it in the
toilet, but there is
nothing
on the toilet paper.
Wet shit
The kind where you wipe your butt 50 times and it
still feels unwiped, so
you have to put some toilet paper between your
butt and underwear so you
won't ruin them with a stain.
Second Wave shit
This happens when you're done shit-ing and
you've pulled up your pants
to your knees, and you realize that you have to
shit some more.
Pop-A-Vein-In-Your-Forehead-shit
The kind where you strain so much to get it out,
you practically have a
stroke.
Gassy shit
It's so noisy, everyone within earshot is
laughing.
Lincoln Log shit
The kind of ahit that is so huge you're afraid
to flush without first
breaking it into little pieces with the toilet
brush.
Corn shit
Self-explanatory.
Gee-I-Wish-I-Could-Shit Shit
The kind where you want to shit but all you do
is sit on the toilet
and fart a few times.
Spinal Tap shit
That's where it hurts so badly coming out, you
would swear it was
leaving you sideways.
Wet Cheeks shit (The Power Dump)
The kind that comes out of your butt so fast,
your butt gets splashed
with water.
Liquid shit
The kind where yellowish-brown liquid shoots out
your butt and splashes all
over the toilet bowl.
Mexican shit
It smells so bad your nose burns.
The Dangling shit
This shit refuses to drop into the toilet even
though you know you are
done shiti-ing it. You just pray that a shake or
two will cut it loose.
The Last and most annoying:
The Surprise shit
You're not even at the toilet because you are
sure you're about to
fart, but oops.......a shit!!!
Anonymous
Ranch Hand

Joined: Nov 22, 2008
Posts: 18944
I am not going to have dinner tonight
R K Singh
Ranch Hand

Joined: Oct 15, 2001
Posts: 5371
Sameer ... I will kill you
Neil Laurance
Ranch Hand

Joined: Jul 18, 2002
Posts: 183
The 'Red Knee' shit. The kind where you take so long, you have little red marks where your elbows were resting.
And its lesser know variant, the 'Pins and Needles' shit. The kind where you try and stand up, but both your legs have gone to sleep.
The 'Just Made It' shit. The kind where you race home, waddle to the toilet at breakneck speed, sit down, and immediately perform a 'Power Dump' of all your shit in one go.
paul wheaton
Trailboss

Joined: Dec 14, 1998
Posts: 20494
    ∞

(in case any powers that be are thinking of killing this thread, I officially approve of keeping this thread. I would much rather see this sort of thing than all the talk of war and getting pissed off.)


permaculture Wood Burning Stoves 2.0 - 4-DVD set
Chumma Fun
Ranch Hand

Joined: May 04, 2001
Posts: 92
!!!
Holly Shit!!!
Anonymous
Ranch Hand

Joined: Nov 22, 2008
Posts: 18944
(in case any powers that be are thinking of killing this thread, I officially approve of keeping this thread. I would much rather see this sort of thing than all the talk of war and getting pissed off.)
Great!
I was thinking one of those sheriffs would come in and replace all references to shit with four stars, or something equally silly
Michael Ernest
High Plains Drifter
Sheriff

Joined: Oct 25, 2000
Posts: 7292

Something silly, like maybe < slacker > ?
badumchish!
R K Singh
Ranch Hand

Joined: Oct 15, 2001
Posts: 5371
A shitty riddle
in Hindi
=========
Uppar Se Gira Bum
Na Haddi Bachhi, Na Dum
=========
in English
============
A bomb is dropped
nothing remains, neither bone nor life.
============
chiiiiii
Sameer Jamal
Ranch Hand

Joined: Feb 16, 2001
Posts: 1870
here is some visual presentation
 
wood burning stoves
 
subject: Dirty but Interesting
 
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