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Well then, how about Lawyer jokes?

Bert Bates
author
Sheriff

Joined: Oct 14, 2002
Posts: 8805
    
    5
What do you call 40 lawyers up to their necks in sand?

Not *quite* enough sand

Why did New Jersey get all the toxic waste dumps, and California all the lawyers?

New Jersey got first pick!

How many lawyers does it take to shingle a roof?

It depends on how thinly you slice them.


Spot false dilemmas now, ask me how!
(If you're not on the edge, you're taking up too much room.)
R K Singh
Ranch Hand

Joined: Oct 15, 2001
Posts: 5371
I protest to this professionist jokes. Its degrading the noble profession of Liar
[whisper]Do you know any jokes on Doctor[/whisper]
Thomas Paul
mister krabs
Ranch Hand

Joined: May 05, 2000
Posts: 13974
Why don't sharks eat lawyers?
Professional courtesy.

What do you call 10,000 lawyers dead at the bottom of the ocean?
A good start.


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Michael Ernest
High Plains Drifter
Sheriff

Joined: Oct 25, 2000
Posts: 7292

Q. What's the difference between a skunk and a lawyer lying dead in the middle of the street?
A. Skid marks in front of the skunk.
---
Q. What's the difference between a porcupine and a law office.
A. A porcupine has pricks on the outside.


Make visible what, without you, might perhaps never have been seen.
- Robert Bresson
Michael Morris
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Joined: Jan 30, 2002
Posts: 3451
A man is in dire need of a heart transplant. So he goes down to the local "Organs 'R Us" and makes his request. The clerk informs him that he has only three hearts. He says, "This one is from a 35 year old that lived a reasonably clean life, no smoking, occasional drink, some excercise, and it's $10,000. This one is from a 25 year old that never smoked, never drank, never used drugs, jogged 5 miles a day, and it's $25,000. This discolored one is from a 55 year old who smoked 3 packs a day, drank 5 martinis a day, frequently used cocaine and never excercised and it's on sale for $100,000."
"Wait a minute, why is the unhealthy heart the most expensive?", asked the shopper.
"Because, it belonged to a lawyer, it's never been used."


Any intelligent fool can make things bigger, more complex, and more violent. It takes a touch of genius - and a lot of courage - to move in the opposite direction. - Ernst F. Schumacher
 
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