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sheep

 
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A shepherd was herding his flock in a remote pasture when
suddenly a brand-new BMW advanced out of the dust cloud towards him.
The driver, a young man in a Broni suit, Gucci shoes, Ray Ban sunglasses
and YSL tie, leaned out the window and asked the shepherd:
"If I tell you exactly how many sheep you have in your flock, will you
give me one?"
The shepherd looked at the man, obviously a yuppie, then looked at his
peacefully-grazing flock and calmly answered, "Sure." The yuppie parked
his car, whipped out his IBM ThinkPad and connected it to a cell phone,
then he surfed to a NASA page on the Internet where he
called up a GPS satellite navigation system, scanned the area, and then
opened up a database and an Excel spreadsheet with complex formulas. He
sent an email on his Blackberry and, after a few minutes, received a
response.
Finally, he prints out a 150 page report on his hi-tech, miniaturized
printer then turns to the shepherd and says, "You have exactly 1,586
sheep". "That is correct, take one of the sheep," said the shepherd.
He watches the young man select one of the animals and bundled it into
his car.
Then the shepherd says: "If I can tell you exactly what your business
is, will you give me back my sheep?"
"OK, why not," answered the young man.
"Clearly, you are a consultant" said the shepherd.
"That's correct," says the yuppie, "but how did you guess that?"
"No guessing required," answers the shepherd. "You turned up here,
although nobody called you. Produced a 150-page report for something that can be printed on one page. You want to get paid for an answer I
already knew, to a question I never asked, and you don't know crap about
my business. Now give me back my dog".
 
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Well, Thats one way of looking at it.
Here's another View :
Lets say the Shepherd had lost a few sheep on the way and hadnt realised it. The Consultant wud have said there are 1500 sheep and the shepherd wud have realised that 86 are missing. Further on , using his GPS satellite navigation system and other gadgets, the Consultant also might have helped the shepherd find his sheep.
One doesnt have to be a genius to realise , what my profession is ; ) I have to defend myself
Ciao
Shaz
[ August 18, 2003: Message edited by: Tintin Herge ]
 
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Now give me back my dog


The consultant mistook a dog for a sheep ?
Or was the shepherd trying some tom foolery in persuading the consultant that he really didn't know crap about his business ? i.e. The sheep was a wolf in sheep's clothing. Businesses do test consultants too.
The consultant should have worked a bit more closely with the shepherd.
"Red sky at night, Shepherd's delight ; Red sky in the morning, Shepherd's warning" is not just a pithy saying.
regards
[ August 18, 2003: Message edited by: HS Thomas ]
 
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Originally posted by Tintin Herge:
Well, Thats one way of looking at it.
Here's another View :
Lets say the Shepherd had lost a few sheep on the way and hadnt realised it. The Consultant wud have said there are 1500 sheep and the shepherd wud have realised that 86 are missing. Further on , using his GPS satellite navigation system and other gadgets, the Consultant also might have helped the shepherd find his sheep.
One doesnt have to be a genius to realise , what my profession is ; ) I have to defend myself
Ciao
Shaz
[ August 18, 2003: Message edited by: Tintin Herge ]



Okay let us say shephard lost some sheep...shephards are always local guys. so if he lost some sheep he is wise enough to figure out where the sheep are and he doesnt need a gps for that. But if a wolf ate sheep, then noone can help that.

 
HS Thomas
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Sheep counting has been an obsession since Medieval Times as recorded in the Domesday Book. c 1150 and long before.

"Sheep may be counted to a glittering total of 25,000 but there is still purpose to be served by recording that one animal was owned by Komawens."
Business Consultants of yore.
regards
[ August 19, 2003: Message edited by: HS Thomas ]
 
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This was originally a blond joke. Can I take this rewrite to signify consultants are no smarter than blonds?
[ August 19, 2003: Message edited by: Damien Howard ]
 
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Originally posted by Damien Howard:
This was originally a blond joke.


Not again !
 
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