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INDIA - 2050

Balaji Loganathan
author and deputy
Bartender

Joined: Jul 13, 2001
Posts: 3150
Year : 2050
Place : Two Americans at IBM, USA.
Subject: : India :Year 2050
This is something we all Indians would love to dream of......
but this is going to become a reality very soon...
Alex : Hi John, you didn't come yesterday to office?
John : Yeah, I was in Indian Embassy for stamping.
Alex : Oh really, what happened, I heard that nowadays it has become
very
strict.
John : Yeah, but I managed to get it.
Alex : How long it took to get it stamped?
John : Oh, he was nasty man, long queue. That's why it got delayed. I
went
there at 2 am itself and waited and returned by 4pm.
Alex : Really? In India, it is a matter of an hour to get stamped for
USA.
John : Yeah, but that is because who in India will be interested in
coming
to USA man. My teacher told me that after 2004, their economy has been
booming.
Alex : So, when are you leaving?
John : Anytime, after receiving my tickets from the client in India and
you
know, I will be getting a chance to fly Air- India. Sort of dream come
true.
Alex : How long are you going to stay in India?
John : What do you mean by how long? I will be settled in India, my
company
has promised me that they will process my Hara Patta (Green Card).
Alex : Really, lucky person man, it is very difficult to get a Hara
Patta in
India.
John : Yeah, that's why, I am planning to marry an Indian girl there.
Alex : But you can find lots of US girls in Bangalore, Hyderabad and
Mumbai.
John : But, I prefer Indian girls because they are bold, beautiful and
cultured.
Alex : Where did you get the offer, Bangalore?
John : Yeah, salary is good there, but cost of living is quite high, it
is
Rs. 1000/- for a single room accommodation.
Alex : I see, that's too much for US people, Rs. 1/ = $ 1000/-. Oh God!
What
about in Hyderabad, Chennai & Mumbai?
John : No idea, but it is less than what we have in Bangalore. It is
like
the world headquarters of Software.
Alex : I heard, almost all the Indians are having one personal Robot
for
help.
John : You can get a BMW car for Rs. 5000/-, and a personal Robot for
less
than Rs. 7500/-. But my dream is to purchase Ambassador, which costs
Rs.200000/- but has got a sexy design.
Alex : By the way, who is your client?
John : A pure Indian origin company, specializing in Embedded Software.
Alex : Oh, really, lucky to work in a pure Indian origin company. They
are
really intelligent and unlike American Bodyshoppers who have opened
their
Fly-by-night outfits in India. Indian companies pay you in full even
when
you are on bench. My friend Paul Allen, it seems, used his bench time
to
visit Bihar, the most liveable place in India, probably world. There
you
have full freedom and no restrictions. You can do whatever you want! I
wonder how that state has perfected that system.
John : Yeah man, you are right. I hope our America also follows their
footsteps.
Alex : How are you going to cope with their language?
John : Why not? From my school days I have been learning Hindi as my
first
language here at New York. At the Consulate they carried proficiency
test in
Hindi and were quite impressed by my cent percent score in TOHIL (Test
of
Hindi as International Language).
Alex : So, you are going to have fun there.
John : Yeah, I will be travelling in the world's fastest train, world's
largest theme park, and the famous Bollywood where you can see actors
like,
Vrithik(son of Hrithik), and all. Esselworld is also near to Bollywood.
Alex : You know, the Indian PM is scheduled to visit US next year, he
may
then relax the number of visas.
John : That's true. Last month, Narayanamurthy Jr. visited White House
and
donated Rs. 20000/- for infrastructure development at Silicon Valley
and has
promised more if we follow the model of Silicon City of Bangalore. Bill
Gates jr. also got a chance of meeting him. Very lucky person.
Alex : But, Indian government is planning to split Narayanamurthy Jr.'s
Infosys & Sons.
John : He is a hard worker man like his father, he can build any number
of
Infosys like this. Every minute he is getting Rs. 1000/-. It seems, if
you
keep all his money converted as Rs. 100/- notes you can reach Pluto.
Alex : OK, Good Luck John.
John : Same to you Alex. And don't go to Consulate in a Kurta Pyjama
because
they will think you are too Indianised and may doubt you will ever come
back
to the US of A and hence your Non-Immigrant Visa may get rejected. But
don't
forget to say "Namaste, aap kaisi hai" to the
receptionist. It seems she likes that and will not give you a visa if
you don't greet her that way.
Mera Bharat Mahan ...........................
Howzzzzzzzzzzzzzzat!!!
R K Singh
Ranch Hand

Joined: Oct 15, 2001
Posts: 5371
Bala ji .. its pretty old mail .. was circulating at the time of boom.. ..
and I think someone had made small changes in it ..
AW still good to put smile
John : What do you mean by how long? I will be settled in India, my
company
has promised me that they will process my Hara Patta (Green Card).


Alex : But you can find lots of US girls in Bangalore, Hyderabad and
Mumbai.


But my dream is to purchase Ambassador,

to visit Bihar, the most liveable place in India, probably world. There
you have full freedom and no restrictions. You can do whatever you want! I wonder how that state has perfected that system.



John : Same to you Alex. And don't go to Consulate in a Kurta Pyjama


"Thanks to Indian media who has over the period of time swiped out intellectual taste from mass Indian population." - Chetan Parekh
Balaji Loganathan
author and deputy
Bartender

Joined: Jul 13, 2001
Posts: 3150
Originally posted by R K Singh:
Balaji .. its pretty old mail .. was circulating at the time of boom.. ..

Oh!.. I thought this is a new spam
sunitha reghu
Ranch Hand

Joined: Dec 12, 2002
Posts: 937
Bala..ji long time no see.
RK, i dont think this is an old mail. Any proof?
Thomas Paul
mister krabs
Ranch Hand

Joined: May 05, 2000
Posts: 13974
A scenario just as likely as the one above:
India 2050 - The exchange of nuclear weapons with Pakistan had left both countries devastated. Those that survived had open sores that would not heal. Most of the population was sterile from the remaining radiation and those that did give birth had children with such horrible birth defects that they were rarely born alive.


Associate Instructor - Hofstra University
Amazon Top 750 reviewer - Blog - Unresolved References - Book Review Blog
Sanjeev Kaushik
Ranch Hand

Joined: Aug 01, 2002
Posts: 105
I read this mail sometime 2 years back.


Sanjeev Kaushik
Balaji Loganathan
author and deputy
Bartender

Joined: Jul 13, 2001
Posts: 3150
Originally posted by sunitha raghu:
Bala..ji long time no see.
RK, i dont think this is an old mail. Any proof?

Thanks Sunitha for remembering me.
Just came back after one month vacation in India, I thought Ravish was also on vacation, then realized that R.K.Singh is Ravish.
Balaji Loganathan
author and deputy
Bartender

Joined: Jul 13, 2001
Posts: 3150
Originally posted by Thomas Paul:
A scenario just as likely as the one above:
India 2050 - The exchange of nuclear weapons with Pakistan had left both countries devastated. Those that survived had open sores that would not heal. Most of the population was sterile from the remaining radiation and those that did give birth had children with such horrible birth defects that they were rarely born alive.

Are you happy now ??
Paavam Payyan
Ranch Hand

Joined: Jun 25, 2002
Posts: 86
Originally posted by Thomas Paul:
A scenario just as likely as the one above:
India 2050 - The exchange of nuclear weapons with Pakistan had left both countries devastated. Those that survived had open sores that would not heal. Most of the population was sterile from the remaining radiation and those that did give birth had children with such horrible birth defects that they were rarely born alive.

Well, there is someone dreaming about getting better than the best, the USA, and here is someone fancying opposition to rotten in hell (even if its no good to themselves)!!
This much respected, well informed, and helpful sheriff turned out to such a dimwit all in a sudden! How unfortunate!!
[ October 16, 2003: Message edited by: Paavam Payyan ]

<i>All that is gold does not glitter, not all those who wander are lost - <b>Gandalf</b></i>
Paavam Payyan
Ranch Hand

Joined: Jun 25, 2002
Posts: 86
Originally posted by Thomas Paul:
A scenario just as likely as the one above:
India 2050 - The exchange of nuclear weapons with Pakistan had left both countries devastated. Those that survived had open sores that would not heal. Most of the population was sterile from the remaining radiation and those that did give birth had children with such horrible birth defects that they were rarely born alive.

And oh, I feel for all those poor American H1B workers who will get vaporised when Pakistan nukes India in 2050!!
Mark Fletcher
Ranch Hand

Joined: Dec 08, 2001
Posts: 897
Originally posted by Thomas Paul:
A scenario just as likely as the one above:
India 2050 - The exchange of nuclear weapons with Pakistan had left both countries devastated. Those that survived had open sores that would not heal. Most of the population was sterile from the remaining radiation and those that did give birth had children with such horrible birth defects that they were rarely born alive.

How about this:
Elsewhere, in the USA, the Cubs reach the playoffs, a feat unheard of since 2003. Cubs fans are banned from attending the playoff games...


Mark Fletcher - http://www.markfletcher.org/blog
I had some Java certs, but they're too old now...
Jason Menard
Sheriff

Joined: Nov 09, 2000
Posts: 6450
Somebody posts a long message that can easily be viewed as offensive to Americans, yet no American chooses to directly take issue with it. Now an American chooses to post a counter to the original (based on widely held fears and predictions I might add) and naturally someone has to hurl insults at him. How predictable.
[ October 16, 2003: Message edited by: Jason Menard ]
Paavam Payyan
Ranch Hand

Joined: Jun 25, 2002
Posts: 86
Originally posted by Jason Menard:
a long message that can easily be viewed as offensive to Americans October 16, 2003: Message edited by: Jason Menard ]

mHaaaHAAAA! (That Bart Simpson laugh!)
Anyone with a half-decent sense of humour and media awareness will laugh at the actual post as a joke, and then would realise how it accurately reflects the thoughts of Indian techies, which in turn drives the whole H1B thing!
Its so obvious even my neighbours six years old daughter understands it! Mind you she is good at Halo too!!
Anonymous
Ranch Hand

Joined: Nov 22, 2008
Posts: 18944
Originally posted by Jason Menard:
widely held fears and predictions

I beg you pardon?
Thomas Paul
mister krabs
Ranch Hand

Joined: May 05, 2000
Posts: 13974
Originally posted by Paavam Payyan:
Well, there is someone dreaming about getting better than the best, the USA, and here is someone fancying opposition to rotten in hell (even if its no good to themselves)!!
What makes you think that I would want that to happen? An exchange of nuclear weapons between any two countries would be devastating for the entire world. And I would certainly not wish such devastation on any country. And I certainly don't see India as the "opposition". But apparently the original poster sees the the US as the opposition.
sunitha reghu
Ranch Hand

Joined: Dec 12, 2002
Posts: 937
Originally posted by Sanjeev Kaushik:
I read this mail sometime 2 years back.

My mistake......
Thomas Paul
mister krabs
Ranch Hand

Joined: May 05, 2000
Posts: 13974
Originally posted by <the Parrot>:

I beg you pardon?

India-Pakistan wins!
http://www.googlefight.com/cgi-bin/compare.pl?q1=us-china+nuclear+war+&q2=india-pakistan+nuclear+war&B1=Make+a+fight%21&compare=1&langue=us
sunitha reghu
Ranch Hand

Joined: Dec 12, 2002
Posts: 937
Originally posted by Jason Menard:
Somebody posts a long message that can easily be viewed as offensive to Americans, yet no American chooses to directly take issue with it. Now an American chooses to post a counter to the original (based on widely held fears and predictions I might add) and naturally someone has to hurl insults at him. How predictable.
[ October 16, 2003: Message edited by: Jason Menard ]

Somebody posts a "long message" (:confused that can be viewed as offensive to Americans( ),yet no American chooses to directly take issue with it.( )Now an American chooses to post a counter to the original( )
My mother once told me if you look through an yellow glass, you think whatever you see is yellow. If you think that "long" messages is offensive, then cant help it. Balaji posted that "just for fun" .........
Thomas Paul
mister krabs
Ranch Hand

Joined: May 05, 2000
Posts: 13974
Reverse it and tell me that an Indian would not find it offensive.
Ravish : But you can find lots of Indian girls in the US.
Balaji : But, I prefer American girls because they are bold, beautiful and
cultured.

Or is the joke that this is the way Indian men really think?
Bhau Mhatre
Ranch Hand

Joined: Jun 11, 2003
Posts: 199
Originally posted by Thomas Paul
But apparently the original poster sees the the US as the opposition.

I admit that some jokes are always poor in taste (including above) no matter what the context or the intention, but trust me Thomas, you got to take such jokes as a compliment because deep down inside many "aspire" to be an amrican I m serious. They don't necessarily see US as an opposition; they just use US as a reference point to measure everything, which is apparent from the facts mentioned in the joke itself- economy, green card, girls, cars, etc.
Probably the original author of the joke was rejected his visa or green-card and came up with this out of frustration


-Mumbai cha Bhau
sunitha reghu
Ranch Hand

Joined: Dec 12, 2002
Posts: 937
I dont think that is offensive. That is their personal choice.
Mani Ram
Ranch Hand

Joined: Mar 11, 2002
Posts: 1140
Oooof....again!
Thomas & Jason: It is a JOKE. If it seems offensive to you because of cultural or language or some other differences between us, then sorry. It happens sometimes and can't be avoided. But then, when people stress that they meant it as a joke and not an insult, you have to take it easy.
Swap US & India in that message, change John & Alex to some Indian names, substitute Bangalore, Chennai with some cities in US and that message is no longer a joke. It becomes a reality! (well I would say it was a reality 2 years back. But now I don't think it is the case)
And using google and googlefight to prove something doesn't make any sense to me. If I change China to North Korea in googlefight, I can declare "US - North Korea" wins. The bottom line is, these things doesn't prove anything (this point is for "the Parrot" also).
[ October 16, 2003: Message edited by: Mani Ram ]

Mani
Quaerendo Invenietis
Thomas Paul
mister krabs
Ranch Hand

Joined: May 05, 2000
Posts: 13974
Thomas & Jason: It is a JOKE.
OK, no harm done.
And using google and googlefight to prove something doesn't make any sense to me.
That was a JOKE.
Mani Ram
Ranch Hand

Joined: Mar 11, 2002
Posts: 1140
Originally posted by Thomas Paul:
[QB][/QB]


Now, you are a strong contender for this.
[ October 16, 2003: Message edited by: Mani Ram ]
R K Singh
Ranch Hand

Joined: Oct 15, 2001
Posts: 5371
Originally posted by Thomas Paul:
Reverse it and tell me that an Indian would not find it offensive.
Ravish : But you can find lots of Indian girls in the US.
Balaji : But, I prefer American girls because they are bold, beautiful and
cultured.
Or is the joke that this is the way Indian men really think?

If it would have been written in 2050 by an american for 3050 then, no I wont feel anything and would have a good laugh.
this is the way Indian men really think?
You might be right [I wont debate the reason for it ]
R K Singh
Ranch Hand

Joined: Oct 15, 2001
Posts: 5371
Originally posted by sunitha raghu:
My mistake......

Oh my Ex {}
Its not your mistake
Tarun Sukhani
Ranch Hand

Joined: Aug 27, 2001
Posts: 53
Originally posted by Thomas Paul:
A scenario just as likely as the one above:
India 2050 - The exchange of nuclear weapons with Pakistan had left both countries devastated. Those that survived had open sores that would not heal. Most of the population was sterile from the remaining radiation and those that did give birth had children with such horrible birth defects that they were rarely born alive.


How about this more likely scenario:
Earth 2050 - A lifeless hulk of an orb is all that remains after the U.S. and Russia, with a combined nuclear stockpile of 20,000 warheads, several thousand tons of chemical and biological weapons, and a sundry assortment of conventional weaponry, finally come to the conclusion that they built these weapons for a reason: to blow the whole f**kin' world a quadrillion times over!
Balaji Loganathan
author and deputy
Bartender

Joined: Jul 13, 2001
Posts: 3150
Originally posted by Thomas Paul:
But apparently the original poster sees the the US as the opposition.

Certainly No!. I have my kins in US and even for a joke, I don't want to bringup my country by nuking other country.
I think you are more afraid that the above joke would become real in future.
Balaji Loganathan
author and deputy
Bartender

Joined: Jul 13, 2001
Posts: 3150
Originally posted by Thomas Paul:
Reverse it and tell me that an Indian would not find it offensive.
Ravish : But you can find lots of Indian girls in the US.
Balaji : But, I prefer American girls because they are bold, beautiful and
cultured.
Or is the joke that this is the way Indian men really think?

I can take it as a joke, but on the other hand I once had a american friend(gal), umm.. she is too much matured, Manly,never shut her mouth, too much blah blah , i just stayed off from her.
Balaji Loganathan
author and deputy
Bartender

Joined: Jul 13, 2001
Posts: 3150
Originally posted by Mumbai cha bhau:

Probably the original author of the joke was rejected his visa or green-card and came up with this out of frustration

Grr!.. How do you know that, I still hate that building(XX embassy) located near Annanagar flyover, Chennai.
R K Singh
Ranch Hand

Joined: Oct 15, 2001
Posts: 5371
How many of you liked this movie. [Basically exchange of roles]
R K Singh
Ranch Hand

Joined: Oct 15, 2001
Posts: 5371
And I found this line funniest
visit Bihar, the most liveable place in India, probably world. There
you have full freedom and no restrictions. You can do whatever you want! I wonder how that state has perfected that system.

[ October 19, 2003: Message edited by: R K Singh ]
 
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subject: INDIA - 2050