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Questions to ponder . . .

Cindy Glass
"The Hood"
Sheriff

Joined: Sep 29, 2000
Posts: 8521
Who was the first person to look at a cow and say, I think I'll squeeze these dangly things here, and drink whatever the hell comes out!"
Who was the first person to say "See that chicken there?.. I'm gonna eat the next thing that comes outta it's butt"
Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the toast to a horrible crisp, which no decent human being would eat?
Why is there a light in the fridge and not in the freezer?
If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why is there a song about him?
Can a hearse carrying a corpse drive in the carpool lane?
If the professor on Gilligan's Island can make a radio out of a coconut, why can't he fix a hole in a boat?
Why do people point to their wrist when asking for the time, but don't point to their crotch when they ask where the
bathroom is?
Why does your OB-GYN or Proctologist leave the room when you get undressed if they are going to look up there anyway?
Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours? They're both dogs!
What do you call male ballerinas?
If Wile E. Coyote had enough money to buy all that Acme crap, why didn't he just buy dinner?
If quizzes are quizzical, what are tests?
If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?
Is Disney World the only people trap operated by a mouse?
Do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star have the same tune?
Did you try singing the two songs above? (yes, you did cuz I know I did)
Why do they call it an asteroid when it's outside the hemisphere, but call it a hemorrhoid when it's in your a$$?
Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's face, he gets mad at you, but when you take him for a car ride, he
sticks his head out the window?
Does pushing the elevator button more than once make it arrive faster?


"JavaRanch, where the deer and the Certified play" - David O'Meara
John Stern
Ranch Hand

Joined: Feb 02, 2004
Posts: 36
Originally posted by Cindy Glass:
Who was the first person to look at a cow and say, I think I'll squeeze these dangly things here, and drink whatever the hell comes out!"

the list goes on:
who is the first person to eat crab?
who is the first person to eat tomato?
is there anyone ever trying to eat a poisoning live snake?
.......................
i guess the moral of the story is: human are creative. new things, new ideas, new ventures are tried out on daily basis. some of them succeed, some of them failed. that is life.
[ February 08, 2004: Message edited by: John Steve ]
John Stern
Ranch Hand

Joined: Feb 02, 2004
Posts: 36
what a coincidence!
"when harry met sally" is on TBS.
when harry met sally, i guess the similar story goes on and on thousands times all over the world, some of them succed, some failed.
only in Hollywood, you can be sure there is a perfect ending.
Welcome to Hollywood! Everybody comes to Hollywood got a dream. What's your dream? What's your dream? Hey, Mister! Hey! What's your dream?
Welcome to Hollywood! What's your dream? Everybody comes here. This is Hollywood, land of dreams. Some dreams come true, some don't. But keep on dreamin'. This is Hollywood. Always time to dream, so keep on dreamin
[ February 08, 2004: Message edited by: John Steve ]
Howard Kushner
author
Ranch Hand

Joined: Sep 19, 2003
Posts: 361
Here are my favorites:
Why do we park in the driveway, and drive on the parkway?
How come Captain Kangaroo is neither a captain nor a kangaroo?


Howard Kushner<br />IBM Certified Enterprise Developer - WebSphere Studio Application Developer V5.0<br />IBM Certified Advanced System Administrator - WebSphere Application Server V5.0<br />IBM Certified Solution Developer - Web Services with WebSphere Studio V5.1<br /><a href="http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/tg/detail/-/1931182108/" target="_blank" rel="nofollow">Developing J2EE Applications with WebSphere Studio</a> my Certification Study Guide for IBM Test 287
John Stern
Ranch Hand

Joined: Feb 02, 2004
Posts: 36
here is one of my favorite:
why your car is measured in horsepower, but your house's furnace is in BTU/hour?
[ February 08, 2004: Message edited by: John Steve ]
vi kam
Ranch Hand

Joined: Oct 14, 2002
Posts: 117
What does OK actually mean ? Now now dont say OK.


Rome did not create a great empire by having meetings -- They did it by killing all those who opposed them
Damien Howard
Ranch Hand

Joined: Apr 01, 2003
Posts: 456
OK is short for Okay. Which means you are all right, or doing well, or just peachy or any other lame phrase you can think off
It can also mean that something is in acceptable condition.
HS Thomas
Ranch Hand

Joined: May 15, 2002
Posts: 3404
Just thought of this one from another thread:
Was I,Claudius (aiie,Claudius) emperor before Claudius I (Claudius Uno) ?
I,Elizabeth before Elizabeth I, similarly ? (assuming there was a Queen Elizabeth.)
Joe King
Ranch Hand

Joined: Sep 02, 2003
Posts: 820
Originally posted by HS Thomas:
I,Elizabeth before Elizabeth I, similarly ? (assuming there was a Queen Elizabeth.)

Um, let me think........ :roll:
Jim Yingst
Wanderer
Sheriff

Joined: Jan 30, 2000
Posts: 18671
Who was the first person to look at a cow and say, I think I'll squeeze these dangly things here, and drink whatever the hell comes out!"
Ymir. Weren't you paying attention in Norse Mythology 101?
If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why is there a song about him?
Denial. Not just a river in Egypt.
Can a hearse carrying a corpse drive in the carpool lane?
Sure, why not? I mean, if you're pulled over, you just ask "See what happened because of this delay?"
If the professor on Gilligan's Island can make a radio out of a coconut, why can't he fix a hole in a boat?
Well heck, if you were stuck on a tropical island with Ginger and Mary Anne, how hard would you be trying? I'm just surprised the others weren't "accidentally" electrocuted at some point.
Why do people point to their wrist when asking for the time, but don't point to their crotch when they ask where the bathroom is?
I see you've never traveled in a country where they don't speak English.
Is Disney World the only people trap operated by a mouse?
Not if you don't have a good pop-up blocker, no.
Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's face, he gets mad at you, but when you take him for a car ride, he
sticks his head out the window?

Actually yes, I did. No idea why. But it's kind of remarkable. The average dog acts as if he was evolved specifically for the purpose of sticking his head out of the window of a moving automobile. Which is a bit perplexing for students of evolutionary biology, for several reasons...
why your car is measured in horsepower, but your house's furnace is in BTU/hour?
Because horsecarts and automobiles are more similar to each other than either is to a house. Not many people were using horses to try to heat their homes. I hope.
What does OK actually mean ?
I have it on good authority that is is the International Standard Abbreviation for "Okely-Dokely".
Was I,Claudius (aiie,Claudius) emperor before Claudius I (Claudius Uno) ?
I,Elizabeth before Elizabeth I, similarly ? (assuming there was a Queen Elizabeth.)

Of course not. The compareTo() method in java.lang.String provides the definitive answer to this question. :roll:
[ February 09, 2004: Message edited by: Jim Yingst ]

"I'm not back." - Bill Harding, Twister
HS Thomas
Ranch Hand

Joined: May 15, 2002
Posts: 3404
Why is there a light in the fridge and not in the freezer?
For that 2am snack after the movies, whatever, no one wants to go poking around for frozen pizza. What I'd want to know :why is the top end of he fridge heavier than the bottom end ?
John Stern
Ranch Hand

Joined: Feb 02, 2004
Posts: 36
Originally posted by Howard Kushner:
Here are my favorites:
Why do we park in the driveway, and drive on the parkway?


my guess is because everything is relative. a driveway is from the standpoint of a still house. a parkway is from the standpoint of a moving car traveling on the road.
maybe that is how it started. but now i think some parkway is marjor street. and reason for that may be the original parkway is renovated to meet changing situation. but the name remained.
[ February 09, 2004: Message edited by: John Steve ]
HS Thomas
Ranch Hand

Joined: May 15, 2002
Posts: 3404
Why is the number thirteen at dinner unlucky ? Unlucky number thirteen
In Norse mythology,at a feast for 12 gods (and goddesses ?) Loki the terrible appeared and was the 13th guest. Then one of the Gods either died or was killed.
The story of Jesus. There is Jesus with 11 disciples at what we now know was the Last Supper. Then along comes Judas the Iscariot (untrustworthy one) who betrays him and thus was indirectly responsible for the crucifiction of Christ.
[ February 09, 2004: Message edited by: HS Thomas ]
Thomas Paul
mister krabs
Ranch Hand

Joined: May 05, 2000
Posts: 13974
Originally posted by John Steve:
my guess is because everything is relative. a driveway is from the standpoint of a still house. a parkway is from the standpoint of a moving car traveling on the road.
Parkway has nothing to do with parking your car. It has to do with how the roads were designed with lots of trees to make them look like a park. Park Avenue in NYC got its name from the tree lined center median that was put in.
http://www.forgotten-ny.com/streetnecrology/AveA/declassified.html


Associate Instructor - Hofstra University
Amazon Top 750 reviewer - Blog - Unresolved References - Book Review Blog
John Stern
Ranch Hand

Joined: Feb 02, 2004
Posts: 36
Originally posted by Howard Kushner:
Here are my favorites:
Why do we park in the driveway, and drive on the parkway?

you know why?
Originally posted by Thomas Paul:
Parkway has nothing to do with parking your car. It has to do with how the roads were designed with lots of trees to make them look like a park. Park Avenue in NYC got its name from the tree lined center median that was put in.
http://www.forgotten-ny.com/streetnecrology/AveA/declassified.html
HS Thomas
Ranch Hand

Joined: May 15, 2002
Posts: 3404
Originally posted by Joe King:

Um, let me think........ :roll:

I checked and there was no Queen Elizabeth before Queen Elzabeth I.
compareTo() would seem to be a safe way of checking.
John Stern
Ranch Hand

Joined: Feb 02, 2004
Posts: 36
Originally posted by HS Thomas:
Why is there a light in the fridge and not in the freezer?
For that 2am snack after the movies, whatever, no one wants to go poking around for frozen pizza. What I'd want to know :why is the top end of he fridge heavier than the bottom end ?

cold air is heavier than hot air, so tend to stay low. when you try to cool something, you want to put ice one top of it. so the ideal structure for fridge/freezer is colder on top. compressor have to work hard to keep the low temp, and you want to keep the therm path as short as possible, so you should keep freezer and all the cooling stuff on top, that makes fridge/freezer heavier on top.
Gregg Bolinger
GenRocket Founder
Ranch Hand

Joined: Jul 11, 2001
Posts: 15299
    
    6

One of my favs from a commericial...
Why are there interstate highways in Hawaii?


GenRocket - Experts at Building Test Data
Matthew Phillips
Ranch Hand

Joined: Mar 09, 2001
Posts: 2676


Do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star have the same tune?
Did you try singing the two songs above? (yes, you did cuz I know I did)


But did you try singing them to the Gilligan's Island theme?


Matthew Phillips
Richard Hawkes
Ranch Hand

Joined: Jan 28, 2003
Posts: 1340
What does OK actually mean ?
OK is the opposite of KO which means "knot okay" ...
Originally posted by Jim Yingst:
Not many people were using horses to try to heat their homes. I hope. - Way back in history some types of farming communities used to share their dwellings with their livestock in order to benefit from the heat. Pigs and cows were most common, so maybe horses too - "Open the door will you, its six horses hot in here".
John Stern
Ranch Hand

Joined: Feb 02, 2004
Posts: 36
Originally posted by vi kam:
What does OK actually mean ? Now now dont say OK.

if you are in oklahoma, i am sure you know what it means
ok looks like a better state than ar (arkansas). when i traveled along I-40 heading west ~6 years ago. the road condition in ar is so poor. but once across the state boundry, the road became so beautiful.
Jeroen Wenting
Ranch Hand

Joined: Oct 12, 2000
Posts: 5093
Originally posted by Howard Kushner:
Why do we park in the driveway, and drive on the parkway?

with today's traffic jams we often go faster on the driveway than on the parkway so the naming was done with great foresight


42
Jeroen Wenting
Ranch Hand

Joined: Oct 12, 2000
Posts: 5093
Originally posted by HS Thomas:
Just thought of this one from another thread:
Was I,Claudius (aiie,Claudius) emperor before Claudius I (Claudius Uno) ?
I,Elizabeth before Elizabeth I, similarly ? (assuming there was a Queen Elizabeth.)

Most certainly.
He was I, Claudius during his lifetime and would only be called Claudius I after he died and was replaced by Claudius II to avoid Confusius
Similarly with Elizabeth (and yes there was a Queen Elizabeth, maybe even more than one).
HS Thomas
Ranch Hand

Joined: May 15, 2002
Posts: 3404
Originally posted by Jeroen Wenting:

with today's traffic jams we often go faster on the driveway than on the parkway so the naming was done with great foresight

HS Thomas
Ranch Hand

Joined: May 15, 2002
Posts: 3404
Originally posted by Richard Hawkes:
What does OK actually mean ?
OK is the opposite of KO which means "knot okay" ...
Originally posted by Jim Yingst:
Not many people were using horses to try to heat their homes. I hope. - Way back in history some types of farming communities used to share their dwellings with their livestock in order to benefit from the heat. Pigs and cows were most common, so maybe horses too - "Open the door will you, its six horses hot in here".

I believe in places in some Russian states they still do :-
In great big "council" tennement blocks the heating systems failed years ago ; so farmyard animals have been moved in to keep them warm in Siberian spells of cold weather.
Bela Bardak
Ranch Hand

Joined: Jan 02, 2004
Posts: 179
Originally posted by Jeroen Wenting:

with today's traffic jams we often go faster on the driveway than on the parkway so the naming was done with great foresight

You live in New Jersey?
John Stern
Ranch Hand

Joined: Feb 02, 2004
Posts: 36
Originally posted by Bela Bardak:

You live in New Jersey?

or maybe san francisco bay area, or maybe LA, chicago.....
trafic jam become a headache everywhere, even canada, japan, china
how many small towns hava you been to, where you can easily find parking space in downtown?
John Stern
Ranch Hand

Joined: Feb 02, 2004
Posts: 36
Originally posted by Richard Hawkes:
What does OK actually mean ?
OK is the opposite of KO which means "knot okay" ...

OK?
out of korea?

[ February 10, 2004: Message edited by: John Steve ]
 
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subject: Questions to ponder . . .