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Certify My Own Certification

Gerald Davis
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Joined: May 15, 2002
Posts: 872
I want to make my own Excel Certification certified by myself to myself for my workplace. It is going to be a joke, but because I am ganna be serious about it, that would make it even funnier. It will also be a more a brief explanation of what I can do with excel.
Chetan Parekh
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Joined: Sep 16, 2004
Posts: 3636
Make one for me too

My name : Chetan Parekh


My blood is tested +ve for Java.
Chetan Parekh
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Joined: Sep 16, 2004
Posts: 3636
Once while preparing efforts estimation of a project, we had to fill in two columns, First - Effort Estimation for Us, Second - effort Estimation for Client.
Stan James
(instanceof Sidekick)
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Joined: Jan 29, 2003
Posts: 8791
Ever see a company get some "prestigous award" from an important sounding organization, like Widget Maker of the year from International Professional Widget Makers For Quality and Integrity ... then you go look up the association and find it has two members, the company who just got the award and the company who got the award last year? You'll have company issuing yourself certification for sure. Make an unregistered non-profit organization, make a web site, post your award, put it on your resume! Charge others $100 for certification! Submit articles to magazines as the CEO of All Who Love Gerald. Go nuts, man!
[ October 29, 2005: Message edited by: Stan James ]

A good question is never answered. It is not a bolt to be tightened into place but a seed to be planted and to bear more seed toward the hope of greening the landscape of the idea. John Ciardi
Gerald Davis
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Joined: May 15, 2002
Posts: 872
I have finished my certificate and it is very nice too. It reads:

THIS IS TO ACKNOLEDGE THAT
Gerry Davis
IS CERTIFID IN EXCEL AND VISUAL BASIC FOR APPLICATIONS AND HAS SUCCESSFULLY COMPLETED ALL REQUIREMENTS AND CRITERIA SET BY GERRY DAVIS HIMSELF

At work they are sure to say how can you give yourself a certificate it is worthless.

I have to come up with something deft like: You are just jealous because you don�t have a certificate awarded from the best at Excel of all the council staff.
Peter Rooke
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Joined: Oct 21, 2004
Posts: 794

You also need to attend a expensive training course, staying at the most expensive hotel, travelling first class, and then spending most of the time in the pub

Alternatively an undergraduate course: University of Bums on Seats
Fasttrack E-Degrees


Regards Pete
Peter Rooke
Ranch Hand

Joined: Oct 21, 2004
Posts: 794

THIS IS TO ACKNOWLEDGE THAT
Peter Rooke
IS GOING TO BE CERTIFID AND SENT TO THE FUNNY FARM, FOR USING EXCEL AND VISUAL BASIC FOR APPLICATIONS. HE HAS SUCCESSFULLY COMPLETED ALL REQUIREMENTS AND CRITERIA SET BY HIMSELF.
 
I agree. Here's the link: http://aspose.com/file-tools
 
subject: Certify My Own Certification
 
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