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Stupid married-name jokes

Michael Ernest
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Joined: Oct 25, 2000
Posts: 7292

I'll seed the topic here:

If Ella Fitzgerald had married Darth Vader, she'd be Ella Vader.

Got one you remember?


Make visible what, without you, might perhaps never have been seen.
- Robert Bresson
Rick Beaver
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Joined: Dec 14, 2004
Posts: 464
Annette Smith married David Ball


ph34r my 133t j4v4 h4><0r1ng sk177z
Sameer Jamal
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Joined: Feb 16, 2001
Posts: 1870
If Brooke Shields had married James Bond, she would be Brooke Bond.
If Bea Arthur married Sting, she'd be Bea Sting.
[ December 08, 2005: Message edited by: Sameer Jamal ]
Sumit Deshpande
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Joined: Jan 10, 2005
Posts: 38
If Lara Dutta had married Brian Lara, she'd be Lara Lara.

-Sumit.
fred rosenberger
lowercase baba
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Joined: Oct 02, 2003
Posts: 11170
    
  16

Oprah Winfrey marries Deepak Chopra... she'd be Oprah Chopra.


There are only two hard things in computer science: cache invalidation, naming things, and off-by-one errors
Michael Ernest
High Plains Drifter
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Joined: Oct 25, 2000
Posts: 7292

Originally posted by Sameer Jamal:

If Bea Arthur married Sting, she'd be Bea Sting.

Ha ha, I like that one.

Here's an old Bobby Slayton married-name joke to end all married-name jokes.

Ida Lupino marries Don Ho, divorces, marries Edgar Allan Poe, divorces, marries Dennis Day, divorces, marries John Doe, and becomes Ida Ho Poe Day Doe.
[ December 08, 2005: Message edited by: Michael Ernest ]
fred rosenberger
lowercase baba
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Joined: Oct 02, 2003
Posts: 11170
    
  16

Here's a few more.
Nick George
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Joined: Apr 04, 2004
Posts: 815
I used to joke with a girl named Kara George about getting married and having named George, with the obvious extension being a middle name George.

George George George-George


I've heard it takes forever to grow a woman from the ground
Ernest Friedman-Hill
author and iconoclast
Marshal

Joined: Jul 08, 2003
Posts: 24183
    
  34

Doesn't George Foreman have something like six kids all named George Foreman?


[Jess in Action][AskingGoodQuestions]
Alan Wanwierd
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Joined: Jun 30, 2004
Posts: 624
Originally posted by Ernest Friedman-Hill:
Doesn't George Foreman have something like six kids all named George Foreman?


I guess that sort of thing is going to happen when you make a career out of being hit hard repeatedly on the head
Paul Clapham
Bartender

Joined: Oct 14, 2005
Posts: 18541
    
    8

Hyphenating your children's names can be fun too. If Mr. Browne marries Ms. Staines then their kids are surnamed "Browne-Staines".
Chetan Parekh
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Joined: Sep 16, 2004
Posts: 3636
If girl whose name starts with M (e.g. Monica) married to Chetan Parekh, she will be MCP. If girl�s name starts with O then OCP, start with J then JCP.


My blood is tested +ve for Java.
Jesus Angeles
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Joined: Feb 26, 2005
Posts: 2049
this one is a first-name joke, just want to share

Virginia was her name; Virgin for short, but not for long.
Nick George
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Joined: Apr 04, 2004
Posts: 815
Anyone know a girl named "Cah"? Because it'd be pretty good if she married Al Pachino
David O'Meara
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Joined: Mar 06, 2001
Posts: 13459

If your middle initial is 'X' you better hope your first name isn't 'Constance'.
Michael Ernest
High Plains Drifter
Sheriff

Joined: Oct 25, 2000
Posts: 7292

If Penny Marshall had married John Candy she'd be Penny Candy.
 
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