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Pls start a Joke chain

Nischal Tanna
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Joined: Aug 19, 2003
Posts: 182
Input from my side:



Thnx
Nischal Tanna
Ranch Hand

Joined: Aug 19, 2003
Posts: 182
Chetan Parekh
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Joined: Sep 16, 2004
Posts: 3636
(1) Why you used CODE tag?
(2) Joke abusing any particular community / country / caste are not allowed in JR.
(3) We already have a thread named Fun Forwards, you can post there.
[ October 15, 2007: Message edited by: Chetan Parekh ]

My blood is tested +ve for Java.
Nischal Tanna
Ranch Hand

Joined: Aug 19, 2003
Posts: 182
A Sardarji finds himself in dire trouble. His business has gone bust
and he's in serious financial trouble. He's so desperate that he
decides to ask Bhagwan for help.

He goes into the temple and begins to pray........... "Oh Bhagwan,
please help me, I've lost my business and if I don't get some money,
I'm going to lose my house as well, please let me win the lotto".

Lotto night comes and somebody else wins it.
The Sardarji goes back to the temple..................... "Bhagwan,
please let me win the lotto, I've lost my business, my house and I'm
going to lose my car as well".

Lotto night comes and the Sardarji still has no luck!!
Back to the temple..................

"My Bhagwan, why have you forsaken me?

I've lost my business, my house, my car and my wife and children are
starving.. I don't often ask you for help and I have always been a
good servant to you. Why won't you just let me win the lotto this one time
so I can get my life back in order???".

Suddenly there is a blinding flash of light as the sky parts open and
the Sardarji is confronted by the voice of Lord :

"SARDARJI, BUY THE D'AMN TICKET FIRST".WITHOUT BUYING TICKETS YOU CANT
WIN"
Arvind Mahendra
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Joined: Jul 14, 2007
Posts: 1162
Is there a quality control thing with these chains.?


I want to be like marc
Nischal Tanna
Ranch Hand

Joined: Aug 19, 2003
Posts: 182
I cant help it guys if the maximum jokes are on a particular community !!..obviously i have not written these...Anyways to cool down things, i m posting intelligent quotes by a sardar Navjot singh sidhu...

Collection of famous quotes by Navjot Singh Sidhu

1. That ball went so high it could have got an air hostess down with it.
2. There is light at the end of the tunnel for India, but it's that of an incoming train which will run them over.
3. Experience is like a comb that life gives you when you are bald.
4. This quote was made after Ganguly called Dravid for a run and midway sent him back and Dravid was run out in the third test against the West Indies at Barbados."Ganguly has thrown a drowning man both ends of the rope."
5. Sri Lankan score is running like an Indian taximeter.
6. Statistics are like miniskirts, they reveal more than what they hide.
7. Wickets are like wives - you never know which way they will turn!
8. He is like Indian three-wheeler, which will suck a lot of diesel but cannot go beyond 30!
9. The Indians are going to beat the Kiwis! Let me tell you, my friend that the Kiwi is the only bird in the whole world, which does not have wings!
10. As uncomfortable as a bum on a porcupine.
11. The ball whizzes past like a bumble -bee and the Indians are in the sea.
12. The Indians are finding the gaps like a pin a haystack.
13. The pitch is as dead as a dodo.
14. Deep Dasgupta is as confused as a child is in a topless bar!
15. The way Indian wickets are falling reminds of the cycle stand at Rajendra Talkies in Patiala one falls and everything else falls!
16. Indian team without Sachin is like giving Kiss without a Squeeze.
17. You cannot make Omelets without breaking the eggs.
18. Deep Dasgupta is not a Wicket Keeper, he is a goalkeeper. He must be given a free transfer to Manchester United.
19. He will fight a rattlesnake and give it the first two bites too.
20. One, who doesn't throw the dice, can never expect to score a six.
21. This quote was made after Eddie Nichols, the third umpire, ruled Shivnarine Chanderpaul 'NOT OUT' in the second test at Port of Spain T&T "Eddie Nichols is a man who cannot find his own buttocks with his two hands."
22. Anybody can pilot a ship when the sea is calm.
23. Nobody travels on the road to success without a puncture or two.
24. You got to choose between tightening your belt or losing your pants.
25. The cat with gloves catches no mice.
26. Age has been perfect fire extinguisher for flaming youth.
27. You may have a heart of gold, but so does a hard-boiled egg.
28. He is like a one-legged man in a bum kicking competition.
29. The third umpires should be changed as often as nappies and for the same reason.
30. Kumble's bowling at the moment is flat as a Dosa
Cameron Wallace McKenzie
author and cow tipper
Saloon Keeper

Joined: Aug 26, 2006
Posts: 4968
    
    1

It's called a cunning array of stunts.
Pavel Kubal
Ranch Hand

Joined: Mar 13, 2004
Posts: 356
Once in a quizshow. There were an Australian and a priest competing against each other. Their scores were equal, so they had to create a verse about "Timbuktu".

The priest began:
"I was a father, all my life,
had no children, had no wife.
I read the Bible, through and through.
On my way to Timbuktu."

Then the Australian told his version:
"When Tim and I to Brisbane went,
we met three ladies cheap to rent.
They were three and we were two,
so I booked one and Tim booked two!"
Arun Kumarr
Ranch Hand

Joined: May 16, 2005
Posts: 513

Jay Leno Jokes.

http://jay-leno-jokes.amray.com/jay-leno.html
[ October 17, 2007: Message edited by: Arun Kumarr ]

If you are not laughing at yourself, then you just didn't get the joke.
Chetan Parekh
Ranch Hand

Joined: Sep 16, 2004
Posts: 3636
Originally posted by Chunnard Singh II:
Is there a quality control thing with these chains.?


If you have any complains, post it inJavaRanch Forum.
Ganesh Kumar
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Joined: Jul 02, 2007
Posts: 113
Pappu: Dad what�s Sex?

Dad gets tensed but explains everything.

Pappu: But dad how do I write all that in this small box of school admission form?
 
I agree. Here's the link: http://aspose.com/file-tools
 
subject: Pls start a Joke chain