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WHY SOME PEOPLE SHOULD NEVER TRAVEL

 
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(Actual comments from travel agents)

I had someone ask for an aisle seat so their hair
wouldn't get messed up
from being near the window.

A client called in inquiring about a package to Hawaii.
After going over
all the cost info, she asked,
"Would it be cheaper to fly to California and then
take the train to
Hawaii?"

I got a call from a woman who wanted to go to Capetown.
I started to
explain the length of the flight
and the passport information when she interrupted me
with "I'm not trying
to make you look stupid, but
Capetown is in Massachusetts." Without trying to make
her look like the
stupid one, I calmly explained,
"Cape Cod is in Massachusetts, Capetown is in Africa."
. Her response ... click.

A man called, furious about a Florida package we did. I
asked what was
wrong with the vacation in Orlando
He said he was expecting an ocean-view room. I tried
to explain that is
not possible, since Orlando is in the
middle of the state. He replied, "Don't lie to me. I
looked on the map and
Florida is a very thin state."

I got a call from a man who asked, "Is it possible to
see England from
Canada?" I said, "No." He said, "But
they look so close on the map."

Another man called and asked if he could rent a car in
Dallas. When I
pulled up the reservation, I noticed he
had a 1-hour layover in Dallas. When I asked him why
he wanted to rent a
car, he said, "I heard Dallas was
a big airport, and I need a car to drive between the
gates to save time."

A nice lady just called. She needed to know how it was
possible that her
flight from Detroit left at 8:20am and
got into Chicago at 8:33am. I tried to explain that
Michigan was an hour
ahead of Illinois, but she could not
understand. Finally, I told her the plane went very
fast, and she bought
that!

A woman called and asked, "Do airlines put your
physical description on
your bag so they know whose luggage
belongs to who?" I said, "No, why do you ask?" She
replied, "Well, when I
checked in with the airline, they put
a tag on my luggage that said FAT, and I'm overweight,
is there any
connection?" After putting her on hold for
a minute while I looked into it" (I was actually
laughing) I came back and
explained the city code for Fresno is
FAT, and that the airline was just putting a
destination tag on her
luggage.

I just got off the phone with a man who asked, "How do
I know which plane
to get on?" I asked him what exactly
he meant, to which he replied, "I was told my flight
number is 823, but
none of these darn planes have numbers
on them."

A woman called and said, "I need to fly to Pepsi-cola
on one of those
computer planes." I asked if she meant to
fly to Pensacola on a commuter plane. She said, "Yeah,
whatever."

A businessman called and had a question about the
documents he needed in
order to fly to China. After a lengthy
discussion about passports, I reminded him he needed a
visa. "Oh no I
don't, I've been to China many times and
never had to have one of those." I double-checked and
sure enough, his stay
required a visa. When I told him this
he said, "Look, I've been to China four times and
every time they have
accepted my American Express."

A woman called to make reservations; "I want to go from
Chicago to
Hippopotamus, New York." The agent was at a
loss for words. Finally, the agent said, "Are you sure
that's the name of
the town?" "Yes, what flights do you have?"
replied the customer. After some searching, the agent
came back with, "I'm
sorry, ma'am, I've looked up every airport
code in the country and can't find a Hippopotamus
anywhere." The customer
retorted, "Oh don't be silly. Everyone
knows where it is. Check your map!" The agent scoured
a map of the state
of New York and finally offered, "You don't
mean Buffalo, do you?" "That's it! I knew it was a big
animal!"
[ July 20, 2002: Message edited by: Jim Yingst ]
 
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I was tempted to delete this post, but innate feeling of curiosity made me ask instead. People of alternative nations, you find it funny? Is there some need to feel superior, these kinds of jokes satisfy? Where does this need originate from, any ideas? Ah, never mind...
[ July 20, 2002: Message edited by: Mapraputa Is ]
 
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the topic isnt exactly politically correct. im sure the US doesnt have a monopoly on idiots. i did find it somewhat humorous though.
 
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I found the stories fairly amusing. I edited the poorly-chosen thread title.
 
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Actually where I live (UK) recently a survey was conducted amongst the European nations and it was found that the English are the most unfriendly, impolite, ignorant tourists of all the countries surveyed.
So no, the USA is not alone in this, but to be honest, Im sure every country in the world has got a minority whom you just *dont* want to be represented by.
I guess then the jokes in the original posting could be applied to habitants of any country.
Cheers!
Mark
 
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Many people, at least in the US, seem enjoying telling such stories about themselves, as long as the listener is trusted not to look down on the teller.
 
Anonymous
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You know, it's funny, Map. When I read that post, I thought the jokes were about Americans. What impression did you get?
 
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Some of the jokes are quite funny MAP ... though some others are PJ

Originally posted by Mapraputa Is:
I was tempted to delete this post, but innate feeling of curiosity made me ask instead. People of alternative nations, you find it funny? Is there some need to feel superior, these kinds of jokes satisfy? Where does this need originate from, any ideas? Ah, never mind...
[ July 20, 2002: Message edited by: Mapraputa Is ]

 
Mapraputa Is
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For those who came later, this thread was titled "why Americans should never go outside their country" or something like this, and I heard enough stories about "stupid Americans" being told with a deep warm feeling of superiority for not to suspect the worst. Maybe I am mistaken. I somehow do not feel comfortable pointing out "stupid" things people of other nations tell or do. But if others feel Ok about these jokes - well, then let's laugh
 
Anonymous
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Well, I can't speak for everyone, but for me, here is how it is:
I have seen enough stupid people in my country to have come to the conclusion that it is not difficult to have above average skill, intelligence, common-sense, etc. Truthfully, I have worked with some of these people. Some of the truly stupid Americans are a cogent argument for why we struggle in world markets.
Seriously. Japan was DEVESTATED in WWII. The US had a significant head-start on electronics, manufacturing, etc. So why do our cars suck so badly in comparison with Hondas and Toyotas? Why are so many of the best electronics manufacturers Japaneese?
Actually, you only have to watch the Jay Lenno show to get an idea how stupid random people on the street can be. It's amazing.
Now, that said, America has produced some of the best and brightest minds in the world today. I am not suggesting that stereotypes of Americans should be that we are stupid ( just that we are loud, rude, and ignorant of other cultures ). It's just disappointing that we haven't used more of our considerable resources to eradicate stupidity.
[ July 23, 2002: Message edited by: Bodie Minster ]
 
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Originally posted by Bodie Minster:
It's just disappointing that we haven't used more of our considerable resources to eradicate stupidity.


Hey, that sounds like a political platform to me. I'd vote for the candidate who pledged to wage a "war on stupidity". My guess though is that the Party of Fear would take a strong stand against this platform, as it could put a hurting on a good number of its constituency.
 
Anonymous
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I've always said that it's easier to vote along certain party lines than it is to get a job.
 
Jason Menard
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Originally posted by Bodie Minster:
Seriously. Japan was DEVESTATED in WWII.


Okay, now this is seriously off topic, but... There is a docudrama playing on Showtime (I think) this month called Hiroshima. It is about the chain of events leading up to the bombings of Hiroshima and Nagasake. The dramatic elements are interspersed with interviews of people from all sides somehow involved in the events as well as actual film footage. It is half in English and half in Japanese, with subtitles, and I think it was produced by a Canadian company.
I highly recommend anyone try to catch this. It didn't appear to show any bias but rather seemed to stick to the facts. Unless you are a history major or something who specializes in that area, I guarantee you will gain new insights. Heavy stuff, but definitely worth a watch.
I now return you to your regularly scheduled meaningless drivel, already in progress.
 
Don't get me started about those stupid light bulbs.
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