Adopting my Daughter

[Ellen Zhao]

Hi Fred,

really nice to hear about the progress. Is Olivia to be picked up in Beijing or somewhere in the South? In early January it would be very cold outdoor in Beijing, be sure to get thick coat ready. But when you get indoor, normally there's heating, shirt or t-shirt should be okay. Winter in South (somewhere near Shanghai) is pure pain. Very cold and wet outdoor (because the air is so wet, no matter how much you wear, the coldness comes directly to your skin. almost all my classmates from north got sick when they were having first winter in Shanghai), and no heating indoor. Of course in hotel there are acs, but anyway be careful when you go to some public place without heating or ac.

I wish I could tell you where to visit in Beijing for one-day trip, what a pity I am not familiar with Beijing. If you are going to Shanghai, I can tell you every detail you want, be sure to call me out here.

I have nothing against the ChunPing, since "country" or not depends on one's taste. Nowadays so many people are snobbery when they name the children, sometimes a "country" name could be very special, fresh and classy. Don't use the Xu any more, most westners cannot pronunce Xu correctly. Olivia is going to be your daughter, I have a much better Chinese family name for her: Luo2. Luo2 sounds very much like the first sylable of your last name "Ro", and, Luo2 is the last name of a super beauty in a very important Chinese ancient poem: Mo4 Shang4 Sang1. The beauty in this poem is called Luo2 Fu1....I'll tell you more about this wonderful beauty later, but for now let me focus on your daughter. An1 is a very good character for name in many ways in my opinion. It does mean "peace". You've got a great choice. And An1 sounds almost exactly like the english word "Ann". So, keep the An1 as the middle character by all means! An1 and Wei4 together sounds like comfort (a verb), so, if you put them together, it could be a bit odd. I have a better character for her: Yan4. Yan4 means knowledgable + elegant. Phonetically, Luo2 and An1 belong to the "flat tone" group, and Yang4 belongs to the "non-flat tone" (zhe4) group, Luo2 An1 Yan4 together is musically beautiful and means beautiful + peaceful + knowledgable + elegant. And, when these three character are written, they look simple and traditional.

here is how the three characters look. you can ask your chinese friends whether it's good




As for learning Chinese, don't worry about the tonalities. In standard modern Mandarin, there are only four tones, not difficult to disdinguish. The real troublie lies in writing the character. That really needs years of serious study. But in fact you can write pinyin instead, which consists of abcdefg....and 1234, people understand it.



regards,
ellen
[ December 06, 2004: Message edited by: Ellen Zhao ]

[fred rosenberger]

Wow... thanks.

Here's what i know right now...

We'll fly into Beijing. We're not sure if she is in Langfang or Tianjin. We have been corresponding with an American mission in Langfang, and they've sent us pictures. But our paperwork from the agency says she's in Tianjin. It may be that the mission took her in for her surgery, and they'll send her back to the orphanage for us to pick her up.

Anyway, after a few days up there, we fly down to Guangzhou. This is where the American Consulate's office is. We'll spend a few more days there doing paperwork, then we come home.

I have no idea how much actual time we'll spend site seeing. I assume we'll hit the big ones - but i'm also told we don't have a lot of time for that.

I appreciate all the info - we'll have to digest it pretty fast!!!

thanks!!!

[Jeroen Wenting]

Good luck Fred. I guess your title should now officially be dad-in-waiting

Go see the sights, even if it's only a taxiride through the city. And take pictures, snap away like a Japanese tourist

And as to your name:
Your name likely means "man from Rosenberg", where Rosenberg would be a town.
In fact, there is a city of Rosenberg in Texas: http://www.tsha.utexas.edu/handbook/online/articles/view/RR/her2.html

A bit of history of surnames:
Names like that are common in Europe, originating in Napoleontic times and before. Before the Napoleontic era surnames were very uncommon and people were known mainly by their first name and profession or first name and their place of residence.
Napoleon dictated that everyone should have a surname and many people just took those names they were already known as as their official name (which of course over time lost meaning so now we have the Carpenters who are singer/songwriters and a butcher called Baker).
[ December 07, 2004: Message edited by: Jeroen Wenting ]

[Helen Thomas]

Good luck, fred.
Perhaps your best Christmas gift!

[Ellen Zhao]

Hi Fred,

Just now I saw your homepage. Wow, a sweet, sweet big family! Na, I am starting to envy Olivia... One question, how big is your email box? I'd like to send you something for Olivia. Every piece is about 3 or 4MB, totally about 15 pieces. Maybe I could send them piece by piece?

If you have only one day in Beijing in January, it's a good idea to take a taxi tour. All my favourite places in Beijing are in the uptown, it really takes time for one to really appreciate their beauty, and those places are bestly to be visited in summer or autumn. I'm sure you'll have time in the future to visit Beijing again. In the downtown there are palaces to see...good to get an overall idea about Beijing in taxi. And, the price is very affordable I think.

Tianjin and Langfang are not far away from each other, and both not far from Beijing. So, it's not a big issue to pick up Olivia once you arrived at Beijing. It takes 4.5+ hours to fly from Beijing to Guangzhou. Guangzhou could be warm in the winter. I've been in Guangzhou only once, had a taxi citytour in half day. Even though Guangzhou is already a big city, the tour cost only around 25 USD (tip included.I was alone then). And in Guangzhou, you really hear some complicated tones...

Be sure to have _big_ cases. In China you really get many good things for a very small price, expecially clothes for children. My suggestion is, you don't have to bring Olivia too many things bought from USA (who knows the clothes, toys...you get are not made in China?), rather, get them in China, and make your cases full when you go back to US.


Best Wishes,
Ellen

[fred rosenberger]

Ellen,

you can mail to my gmail account - frozenfred at gmail dot com

there is plenty of space there. Thanks for all the advice and information!!

fred

[fred rosenberger]

Ok, so it's one week until we leave for China. We're actually leaving on the 5th from st. louis. We change planes in denver, then we have a 5 hour layover in LAX. From there we fly to Guangzhou, change planes once more, and fly to Beijing. i think we arrive two days after we leave.

We opted to leave sooner/stay a little later to get the "premium economy" seats. I'm 6'0" (not giganticly tall, but a little taller than average), so we thought the little bit of extra room would make those long flights a little easier on me.

I think we then leave on the 23rd. What i find enlessly amusing is we leave on the 23rd at 9pm and arrive in LAX at 6pm the same day.

We're spending the night in LA along with about 7 other couples, since we didn't want to get into st. louis at 1am. on the 24th we then fly to Chicago, one last change of planes, and then back in good old st. louis.

i am expecting to meet my daugher on monday, the 11th. but that's just a guess at this time.

i've got one more tile to put down in the floor of her room - it's around/behind the radiator, so it needs a little creative cutting and sizing. then we just need to clean out the tools, shop vac, trash, and arrange the furniture.

I'm beginning to believe this is really going to happen now... and i'm not sure if i'm more excited or terrified!!!

[Ellen Zhao]

Ach Fred the big man! I imagine your long flight would be quite tiring. take care!

My best wishes to your wife, your daughter and you. And enjoy yourself in China.

[Ellen Zhao]

Something interesting to read before you take off for China:

http://photo.net/travel/china/

Wish you everything the best!

[fred rosenberger]

So we're leaving tomorrow. we're taking turns panicking, but so far we've not had the 'both panicked at the same time' issue. i think that's part of the reason why our marriage works so well... were (usually) able to sense when the other one is worried, and so we then set our worries aside to help calm the other one.

I probably won't be posting again for a while, so i hope the Ranch does ok without me!!! (ha ha ha).

fbr

[Mapraputa Is]

Good luck with your trip! When you plan to be back?

[Jason Menard]

Good luck Fred! We look forward to seeing new pictures when you get back!

[Jeroen Wenting]

Originally posted by Mapraputa Is:
Good luck with your trip! When you plan to be back?

24th according to an earlier post. Add a few days of jetlag and getting the kid settled in, I'd say the next coherent post will probably be sometime at the end of this month at the earliest

[Jerry Young]

Fred is the third person, besides the other 2 I personally I know in US, who adopted a girl from China. One girl is from Shanghai, another is from Chongqin. The girls are in very nice families now.

As a Chinese I don't know what to say about this.

I wish I had seen this posting earlier. I'd been in Beijing for quite some time and I might have offered some advice.

Good luck, and do keep us posted.

[fred rosenberger]

hi fellow ranchers!!!

We're in Guangzhou, on the mainland near Hong Kong. We've had quite an adventure.

we got delayed out of st. louis last week, and missed all our connections. we spent the night in Denver, the next night in LA, and got to China 2 days late. we got off the plane in Beijing, and went straight to the orphanage to pick up our daughter. we missed seeing the Wall and Tianamen square, but we got Olivia, which is what is important.

Of course, with the layovers, our luggage never showed up in China. I'm prety sure it's lost in the Denver Airport somewhere, and that we will never see it again.

funniest thing to happen so far... when we were signing the adoption paperwork at the orhpanage, it was in Chinese. We were there with another couple, who were adopting a little boy. we were signing the forms our translator put in front of us. Jay and Christine had both signed their form, and i had signed ours, Stacey (my wife) was about to, when the translator said "STOP!!!"

They had switched the forms, so we were adopting the little boy and they were adopting our daughter. To fix this, they literally took a razor blade and scraped off the signiatures and had us resign the correct ones.

Olivia is doing well, and is quite beautiful. She is already calling me "Baba" (chinese for father) and Stacey "Mama". Whenever we give her something, she puts her hands together, bows, and says "thank you" in Chinese.

gotta go, it's time to feed the Little Emperess...

[Ellen Zhao]

Hi Fred!!

Nice to hear from you and I'm really sorry to hear about the loss of your luggage. There's a Chinese saying that "Jiu4 de0 Bu2 Qu4, Xin1 de0 Bu4 Lai2", which means "if the old doesn't go, the new doesn't come." Glad to hear your wife, you and Olivia are all fine, cheer up!

Beijing has been bitterly cold during the last week, did you have any trouble caused by the weather? And how do you like Guangzhou?

Looking forward to your further news.


Ellen

[Jeroen Wenting]

contact your airline for the lost luggage.
I'd not be surprised if it did make it to Beijing (am I the only one who still thinks Peking?) and is in a lost luggage locker there (or else somewhere along the way).

Sometimes bags show up in miraculous ways. My dad once had his show up in another airport in his destination city after it was rerouted.
He was flying Amsterdam-Sao Paulo direct and his bags got sent via Frankfurt (from which the flight to Sao Paulo goes to another airport), so there is yet hope.

[Jessica Sant]

congrats Fred! I hope the flight home goes smoothly for the three of you!

[Jason Menard]

So what's the latest Fred? Any news for us? How's everything going? Any new pictures?

[fred rosenberger]

sorry it's been so long, but... well... you know.

We're back, and life is wonderful. We had about 30 people meet us at the airport, and Olivia basically 'held court' to meet all her subjects. all 7 of her cousins were there, ranging from 13.5 down to 2.5 years of age. it was fun.

she adapted to the time zone change much faster than we did. the first week or so was miserable for us, but she was fine in a couple days. the weirdest part was figuring out what 2-yr olds DO all day. on the other hand, all our time seemed to vanish.

Olivia started daycare this week. i get up and get ready for work, while stacey gets Olivia dressed. i then take her in, giving stacey about an hour to herself before SHE goes to work. i come home, and then have about an hour to myself before they then come home.

I think Olivia loves daycare. it's pretty close to what she's been used to for her first two years, except at the end of the day, her parents bring her home. She gets along great with the other kids, is learning the school's routines, and seems to be participating quite nicely.

i'll see if i can get some photos posted somewhere. we don't have a lot from here, most of what we have are from when we were still in China.

Hope that answers most of your questions, if not, as always, ask away.

THANKS!!!

[fred rosenberger]

oh, and our luggage did show up. it had been delivered to our house in St. Louis while we were in China. so at least we had clean clothes when we got home!!!

[Jason Menard]

Very cool! That's great to hear everything is going well. It sounds like she is adapting pretty fast to the new changes in her life. Look forward to seeing the pictures.

[kayal cox]

Thanks for updating this thread...

I realize what you are saying about having/not having kids of our own not affecting the decision to adopt another... And you are right, it really shouldn't. Both are lifetime commitments, and we can't back out of either.. Would I love one child less than the other? well, I am sure I wouldn't, atleast I think I wouldn't. And God knows, there are more than enough kids out there who need a home and a family.

Hmm, okay, guess you all know what is the topic of conversation at dinner in my home today.
[ March 03, 2005: Message edited by: kayal cox ]

[peter wooster]

It's great to hear that everthing has worked out. I wish you and your new family the best. It sounds like Olivia is fitting in already.

[fred rosenberger]

My wife has started a blog with more photos. it's not all Olivia, but it's MOSTLY Olivia...

she's very excited, and will probably keep it updated for a few more months, anyway.

and i apologize for the name...

http://rosenbloger.blogspot.com

[Jason Menard]

Great pictures! Thanks for sharing.

[Gail Schlentz]

Wow - cool pictures! Congrats on your wonderful little girl!

[Nischal Tanna]

Hi fred (lowercase dad )

You n ur wife really sound to be best friends of each other ..cool ideas... i do think those who are getting all gr8 things (money,love,etc ) shud somehow somewhere return it to the world .. After all ther's just 1 birth.. never know when again

[Jim Yingst]

[Nischal]: Hi fred (lowercase dad )

No, Fred is really going to be the uppercase Dad in this case. Being a biological father comes all too easily (no pun intended) - being a real father takes real commitment. Fred, thanks for your continued postings here; you're an inspiration to us all.

[Fred]: and i apologize for the name...

Well c'mon - you could at least double up the g for us.
[ April 02, 2005: Message edited by: Jim Yingst ]

[fred rosenberger]

Well c'mon - you could at least double up the g for us.

it was already taken.

[fred rosenberger]

ok, new funny story...

in China, parents are often referred to as "Mama" and "Baba" - the terms rhyme. Our daughter was no exception. we sent the ladies at her orphanage a photo book of us before we arrived. Every day, they would show Olivia the photos, point to us, and start teaching her who Mama and Baba was.

It was quite easy for her to start addressing us by those terms when we met.

now, fast forward to a few months ago. Olivia has now been with us for 7-8 months, and is rapidly learning english.

Mama is not an uncommon term here. it's often shortened to one syllable, and becomes "Mom". "Dada", often gets shortened to just "Dad".

Olivia has done the logical thing. she has shortened what she used to call me, "Baba" to one syllable, so now, she calls me "Bob".

[Gail Schlentz]

"bob rosenberger" ... it does have a nice ring, huh??

[Ramender Mall]

Hi all,

I came across this thread today, and i read it from the 1st post to this latest posted by elaine, in one go....(wooh, i never knew i had such a reading capability )....

Well Done Fred ....
and best of luck to you and ur family....

gud luck...........

[Stuart Ash]

This is really one of the most beautiful acts of love I have seen. Reading this whole thread was a very moving experience. I wish Fred, his wife and kid lots of joy and happiness.

[David O'Meara]

Yeah, thanks bob

[Sameer Jamal]

So Fred any updates ?

[Sonny Gill]

Originally posted by Stuart Ash:

someone care to add??

Stuart, this thread is about Fred's personal experience of adopting his daughter. IMO, it wouldn't be nice to divert it to other discussions. Perhaps you can start another thread...

[Sue Meng]

Originally posted by Stuart Ash
There are many reasons:

1. China's got a reputation for manufacturing.

2. China is good material, though breakable.

You started here too

[Sripathi Krishnamurthy]

Fred,
Congratulations !!

But why a girl from China? Why not from USA, your homeland? Pardon me if its personal.
[ November 25, 2005: Message edited by: Sripathi Krishnamurthy ]

[Stuart Ash]

Originally posted by Sonny Gill:


Stuart, this thread is about Fred's personal experience of adopting his daughter. IMO, it wouldn't be nice to divert it to other discussions. Perhaps you can start another thread...

Sorry for my impertinence. I've now deleted that frivolous post.

But my previous post in this thread was ernest and I reiterate what I said there.